1. War is just the worst. It brings out the worst in people and makes living the worst for those who stay good.
2. People in history must have just been cold all.the.time.
3. Watching babies cry in movies is waaaay more traumatic now than before having a kid.
Case in point for all three, this scene:
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10.14.2015
3 Pieces of Art
Lately I've been really into buying art. Not fancy pants stuff but stuff I just love. Today I was looking through the coffee table book of Steve McCurry photographs (his Afghani girl with green eyes photo is perhaps one of the most well known photos ever) and was just amazed at how I can like many photos, can appreciate the technique and value of others and then there are just a few that almost made my head buzz I like them so much.
Last summer I walked around the Bellevue Arts fair, which takes up the mall parking garage for a long weekend every summer and came away with two strong emotions: first, I just want my life to be full of beautiful things. And second, a sort of desperation at how expensive it can be. (Side note: I wonder if modern tools and technology have made making really wonderful art more accessible and affordable. I imagine so. There's just so much crap out there too)
There's this feeling when you find a piece of art you love that honestly feels like love. It may sound overly dramatic but it really is true. It doesn't happen often, but when it does there's this feeling of completeness, if only for a moment. I'm sure there's some quote from the Goldfinch about it, which I read recently, something about how you see this beautiful thing and get lost in it. It makes you happy or sad or confused or whatever. I get back to reality pretty quick, but that moment is memorable.
Purchases of late:
1. Rising by Robert Tandecki
This was one I saw at the Bellevue Arts Fair last year. Loved it. Knew Porter would love it, and talked myself out of buying it. I thought about it enough times that I tracked down the guy down and bought it from his house in Sumner. Felt very shady, even though it wasn't.
The orca is Porter's spirit animal. The mountains are his inspiration. And he lives for the sea. And it sure does look nice.
2. Pancakes by Pascal Campion
I follow Pascal's daily sketches on Instagram (as should everyone, I say). He is a genius with color and depicting moments, usually around family life and cities that are entirely relatable. Some of my favorites show a kid staring up at the sky, a series of activity in a kitchen, and a potty training celebration.
I bought this one because one, Pascal was having an Instagram followers sale where I saved like four bucks, and two, this is so me and Porter. The light. The energy. The smiles that match Porter's and mine when I just want to kiss him hard and he's in the middle of doing something productive.
3. Melancholy by Edward Degas
I saw this at a museum once, I can't remember where, but I remember it was on a dark blue wall and I kept coming back to it. Melancholy, I think, is one of the most potent emotions. Even though the way I experience it, it almost feels like a non-emotion. Difficult to articulate but it is easy to identify. I can track emotional times in my life by memorable bouts of melancholy.
So I loved it like I haven't many pieces of art hanging in museums and I think about it sometimes even when not feeling melancholy, there's something so familiar about her expression. So I bought it. And now I own it. And I can look at it whenever I want.
Last summer I walked around the Bellevue Arts fair, which takes up the mall parking garage for a long weekend every summer and came away with two strong emotions: first, I just want my life to be full of beautiful things. And second, a sort of desperation at how expensive it can be. (Side note: I wonder if modern tools and technology have made making really wonderful art more accessible and affordable. I imagine so. There's just so much crap out there too)
There's this feeling when you find a piece of art you love that honestly feels like love. It may sound overly dramatic but it really is true. It doesn't happen often, but when it does there's this feeling of completeness, if only for a moment. I'm sure there's some quote from the Goldfinch about it, which I read recently, something about how you see this beautiful thing and get lost in it. It makes you happy or sad or confused or whatever. I get back to reality pretty quick, but that moment is memorable.
Purchases of late:
1. Rising by Robert Tandecki
This was one I saw at the Bellevue Arts Fair last year. Loved it. Knew Porter would love it, and talked myself out of buying it. I thought about it enough times that I tracked down the guy down and bought it from his house in Sumner. Felt very shady, even though it wasn't.
The orca is Porter's spirit animal. The mountains are his inspiration. And he lives for the sea. And it sure does look nice.
2. Pancakes by Pascal Campion
I follow Pascal's daily sketches on Instagram (as should everyone, I say). He is a genius with color and depicting moments, usually around family life and cities that are entirely relatable. Some of my favorites show a kid staring up at the sky, a series of activity in a kitchen, and a potty training celebration.
I bought this one because one, Pascal was having an Instagram followers sale where I saved like four bucks, and two, this is so me and Porter. The light. The energy. The smiles that match Porter's and mine when I just want to kiss him hard and he's in the middle of doing something productive.
3. Melancholy by Edward Degas
I saw this at a museum once, I can't remember where, but I remember it was on a dark blue wall and I kept coming back to it. Melancholy, I think, is one of the most potent emotions. Even though the way I experience it, it almost feels like a non-emotion. Difficult to articulate but it is easy to identify. I can track emotional times in my life by memorable bouts of melancholy.
So I loved it like I haven't many pieces of art hanging in museums and I think about it sometimes even when not feeling melancholy, there's something so familiar about her expression. So I bought it. And now I own it. And I can look at it whenever I want.
10.08.2015
3 Things that made Jamie's night
Tonight the kid woke up at 10 pm ready to PARTY. Apparently what I thought sad goodnight til morning was just s power nap, saving energy for:
1. Split Jerk
No joke. It's a crossfit move: Jump, lift up arms (or a barbell if you are doing it for real), land in a lunge. Don't think I get it of shy people do it, but I asked Porter about arm workouts and was showing me the move and Jamie just about lost it! He hasn't laughed much yet. Lots of smiling (and I mean lots), with a few mini giggles here and there. Usually if he's really getting a kick out of something he does that silent laugh where you don't breathe. It's cute, but unsettling (not unlike hid tendency for panting when he's excited and wheezing for fun). But man, a split squat thing and he was in stitches? Of course now I'm sure Jamie is destined for Crossfit competitions.
2. My baggy camo sleep shirt
Jamie's been doing this thing lately where he grabs something tight, holds it out and up, and ... Growls. Grunts? It's a bit like Tim the Toolman Taylor but longer, more animal-like, and the sentiment more reminiscent of man's celebration of making fire. It's primal joy, I guess. Tonight my shirt brought out the caveman, which was nice for the copious amounts of spit-up that followed the late night mania.
3. Porter's German accent
Let's get real, my husband has a mildly impressive repertoire of accents from around the world, varying in accuracy and his ability to stay in character without getting weird. His German guy is pretty great, and tonight probably prompted by Jamie's future as a Crossfit heckler. He's all Arnold a la Kindergarten Cop, which is my favorite Arnold, mostly because I've never seen the Terminator, I don't live in California, and I have a vague notion from checkout stand magazines that he cheated on Maria Shriver and fathered kid out of wedlock but he kept it a secret for years. Kind of like Caleb and the redhead girl in the OC.
Tangent! Jamie loved the accent. As do I, so we both had a good time tonight.
1. Split Jerk
No joke. It's a crossfit move: Jump, lift up arms (or a barbell if you are doing it for real), land in a lunge. Don't think I get it of shy people do it, but I asked Porter about arm workouts and was showing me the move and Jamie just about lost it! He hasn't laughed much yet. Lots of smiling (and I mean lots), with a few mini giggles here and there. Usually if he's really getting a kick out of something he does that silent laugh where you don't breathe. It's cute, but unsettling (not unlike hid tendency for panting when he's excited and wheezing for fun). But man, a split squat thing and he was in stitches? Of course now I'm sure Jamie is destined for Crossfit competitions.
2. My baggy camo sleep shirt
Jamie's been doing this thing lately where he grabs something tight, holds it out and up, and ... Growls. Grunts? It's a bit like Tim the Toolman Taylor but longer, more animal-like, and the sentiment more reminiscent of man's celebration of making fire. It's primal joy, I guess. Tonight my shirt brought out the caveman, which was nice for the copious amounts of spit-up that followed the late night mania.
3. Porter's German accent
Let's get real, my husband has a mildly impressive repertoire of accents from around the world, varying in accuracy and his ability to stay in character without getting weird. His German guy is pretty great, and tonight probably prompted by Jamie's future as a Crossfit heckler. He's all Arnold a la Kindergarten Cop, which is my favorite Arnold, mostly because I've never seen the Terminator, I don't live in California, and I have a vague notion from checkout stand magazines that he cheated on Maria Shriver and fathered kid out of wedlock but he kept it a secret for years. Kind of like Caleb and the redhead girl in the OC.
Tangent! Jamie loved the accent. As do I, so we both had a good time tonight.
10.05.2015
3 Things I Don't Feel Bad About
As it turns out, the world of motherhood is rife with guilt. There's a lot of hoo ha talk about how moms need to let other moms make their own decisions, but even still, there's a giant economic machine of baby crap to buy and forums full of anonymous posters and parents themselves who are looking for validation for their own decisions because, as it turns out, no one really knows what the crap they are doing.
Snuggle photo dump!
More on that, I'm sure.
But there are three things I feel pretty great about (most of the time) and no amount of smug, passive-aggressive or well-meaning commentary can make me feel bad.
1. I will breastfeed where I need to.
No, I will not strip down and flash my boob, nor will I throw a tantrum if it looks like I'm making someone uncomfortable. I will make accommodations for situations where it may be less appropriate for the flash of nipple that's bound to make an appearance to be inappropriate or a distraction. I will be as discreet as I can be while not making myself or my baby inordinately uncomfortable. And I will nurse where I am. This includes, but is not limited to the dinner table, a sitting room, an airplane seat, a public bench, a public beach, among a group of friends, with a group of acquaintances, amidst a group of strangers. I can and will excuse myself quietly when I am uncomfortable nursing in a given situation. I don't need fanfare, sympathy, or an approving nod.
2. I will sit and snuggle
Best advice I received about the first bit (especially coming off a fairly hectic schedule, and having sit around and do nothing guilt to begin with) is to soak it up. Soak up the tiny body, the tiny sounds, and the fleeting time your baby weighs less than a bowling ball. I will not feel guilty for not cleaning, walking visitors to the door, doing something productive, getting starting on getting back the pre-baby bod (barf!). I will not even feel guilty for not getting out and enjoying sunshine or tending to personal hygiene.
I see it in the wistful eyes of every stranger who I pass, so many of whom comment, almost painfully nostalgic, 'OH, I remember those days. The way my baby just curled into my chest, and stretched, and yawned, and stared, and grew. Breathe him in.'
3. I want to work... but not that much.
I struggle most with not feeling bad about this conflict, even though I've read a number of studies that confirm that most women feel this way, but so many women evangelize staying home as if it is the only life to strive for. And women who work full time defend it to the point of pushiness, as if not working full time is turning back the clock on women's rights.
But I love working. I love my job. I love the time away from my baby and the socialization that comes with it. I'm good at what I do and want to get better. But it's not my life. And I want to be home. To not be harried and to not need to plan the minutes of my day so carefully.
I don't begrudge those who work more or less than me (unless they make me feel bad for my own balance). I'm lucky to get to have what I feel like is the best of both worlds, and until that luck runs out, I'll take advantage.
Snuggle photo dump!
8.31.2015
8.23.2015
3 things I don't love about my baby right now.
Who said it was all roses, right?
Actually no one. Quite the opposite, everyone loves telling expecting mom how miserable it will all be. I won't go as far as misery, but here are, at 5 months old, some things I'm not crazy about:
1. Claws
Baby nails grow so fast! And crooked! And sharp! And they are hard to cut! Porter is on fingernail duty (and quite adept at it), so I've actually only done it a few times, but it's hard too! He scratches my face, he scratches his face, it's obnoxious!
2. Spit-up
I was sure we had dodged the spit-up bullet when after about 2 months I had only seen a few dribbles. Boy was I wrong. So much spit up. Copious amounts of half-digested milk. Sometimes coming up with a burp, sometimes a surprise attack. Usually with a guilty grin after, but always disgusting.
3. Squawking
I'm really not sure of the etiquette here. I can tend to a crying baby in public, but what do I do with a squawker? When it's so loud you can't keep conversation going? I don't mind the sound itself, necessarily as I mind the uncertainty of whether or not it's OK for the squawking to be disrupting whatever social setting I may be in, or how best to handle it. He's such a cute little bird, I'm loathe to stop him, but sometimes it really is inappropriate!
Actually no one. Quite the opposite, everyone loves telling expecting mom how miserable it will all be. I won't go as far as misery, but here are, at 5 months old, some things I'm not crazy about:
1. Claws
Baby nails grow so fast! And crooked! And sharp! And they are hard to cut! Porter is on fingernail duty (and quite adept at it), so I've actually only done it a few times, but it's hard too! He scratches my face, he scratches his face, it's obnoxious!
2. Spit-up
I was sure we had dodged the spit-up bullet when after about 2 months I had only seen a few dribbles. Boy was I wrong. So much spit up. Copious amounts of half-digested milk. Sometimes coming up with a burp, sometimes a surprise attack. Usually with a guilty grin after, but always disgusting.
3. Squawking
I'm really not sure of the etiquette here. I can tend to a crying baby in public, but what do I do with a squawker? When it's so loud you can't keep conversation going? I don't mind the sound itself, necessarily as I mind the uncertainty of whether or not it's OK for the squawking to be disrupting whatever social setting I may be in, or how best to handle it. He's such a cute little bird, I'm loathe to stop him, but sometimes it really is inappropriate!
6.22.2015
3 Reactions to Baby
I've got this accessory now that goes with me everywhere. It's a conversation-starter at the very least and catalyst for fast stranger friendship at its best. As a social person who has a secret love of interacting with strangers, it's really the best. Only one person I've interacted with in the last three months has had zero reaction to the baby. Not even a glance, a passing mention or anything. It was bizarre, and actually the prompt for this post, because it was so out of line with my other experience. I didn't need him to react, but fact is, everyone else on the planet does.
The three most common reactions are:
1. "Awwww" or the non-verbal face that matches it
The most common, for obvious reasons. Not everyone has the luxury of interacting with me and my tiny human. Most often I am walking in public and, like a sea parting, strangers make a little melty face and just sigh at the show-stopper that is a brand new tiny baby.
2. Lots of questions and opinions
The least common, mostly because I don't usually engage, unless I'm really in the mood to be chatty. It's amazing, though, how quickly people can get from zero to advice giving. Or story recounting. I've had some spectacularly heartwarming conversations with people in the park and at the grocery store (it's not like I go so many places). And I'm pretty good at the smile and 'that's great' canned response for anything out of left field.
3. "My baby is ___"
My favorite, sometimes coupled with one of the other responses, but frequent and special enough to warrant its own line item. 'My baby is 1' 'My baby is 10' 'My baby just turned 55.' Maybe it's because all babies really do look alike. There's probably also some hormonal/genetic thing that responds to tiny babies. But I love it. To me it is the most genuine connection. We may have zero in common in our regular lives, but we both have had this shared experience of the first few months - of snuggles, of unknowns and guessing, of this deep, life-changing love that feels fresh and unmottled by bad behavior and negative relationships. And someday when Jamie is big or annoying or mad at me I will look at someone with a brand new one and remember.
The three most common reactions are:
1. "Awwww" or the non-verbal face that matches it
The most common, for obvious reasons. Not everyone has the luxury of interacting with me and my tiny human. Most often I am walking in public and, like a sea parting, strangers make a little melty face and just sigh at the show-stopper that is a brand new tiny baby.
2. Lots of questions and opinions
The least common, mostly because I don't usually engage, unless I'm really in the mood to be chatty. It's amazing, though, how quickly people can get from zero to advice giving. Or story recounting. I've had some spectacularly heartwarming conversations with people in the park and at the grocery store (it's not like I go so many places). And I'm pretty good at the smile and 'that's great' canned response for anything out of left field.
3. "My baby is ___"
My favorite, sometimes coupled with one of the other responses, but frequent and special enough to warrant its own line item. 'My baby is 1' 'My baby is 10' 'My baby just turned 55.' Maybe it's because all babies really do look alike. There's probably also some hormonal/genetic thing that responds to tiny babies. But I love it. To me it is the most genuine connection. We may have zero in common in our regular lives, but we both have had this shared experience of the first few months - of snuggles, of unknowns and guessing, of this deep, life-changing love that feels fresh and unmottled by bad behavior and negative relationships. And someday when Jamie is big or annoying or mad at me I will look at someone with a brand new one and remember.
6.10.2015
The danger of expecations
Usually I would admit that I hold myself to too high of expectations for myself. I went to a therapist for a minute (I highly recommend it!) and the vast majority of our conversations centered on my self-perception of all the grand things I am and could do, and thus should do-- and the emotional repercussions of holding myself to grand things when shortcomings and reality come to bear. The long and short of it is that you feel bad.
I'd argue with the therapist that lowering expectations was not the answer. That you need a high bar even if you feel bad when you miss it. This isn't to say that I have a high bar in all areas of my life. I'm happy to call myself average in a number of areas of my life: messiness, handwriting, ability to care about local news, to name a few. But the height of ones expectations for a certain experience or performance or ability or whatever it is shouldn't necessarily stay where it subconsciously lands. Meaning, sometimes we place the bar too high- we expect too much out of ourselves or others. And sometimes it's too low. At least in my crazy brain, a big part of life is making sure I'm measuring myself against a bar that I find fair. Making sure I'm conscientious about how I'm counting myself successful.
I've entered mommyland now, which is, by all accounts, a highly emotional world of comparison, advice, and constant threat of regret or failure. And I'm articulating it now I guess as a reminder to myself to set my bar where I want it. No reason to push for things I don't actually find important. All the reason to push for things that I do find important, even if no one else does.
I'd argue with the therapist that lowering expectations was not the answer. That you need a high bar even if you feel bad when you miss it. This isn't to say that I have a high bar in all areas of my life. I'm happy to call myself average in a number of areas of my life: messiness, handwriting, ability to care about local news, to name a few. But the height of ones expectations for a certain experience or performance or ability or whatever it is shouldn't necessarily stay where it subconsciously lands. Meaning, sometimes we place the bar too high- we expect too much out of ourselves or others. And sometimes it's too low. At least in my crazy brain, a big part of life is making sure I'm measuring myself against a bar that I find fair. Making sure I'm conscientious about how I'm counting myself successful.
I've entered mommyland now, which is, by all accounts, a highly emotional world of comparison, advice, and constant threat of regret or failure. And I'm articulating it now I guess as a reminder to myself to set my bar where I want it. No reason to push for things I don't actually find important. All the reason to push for things that I do find important, even if no one else does.
6.07.2015
Loving Parents, three ways
Today Jamie was blessed at church. It was an occasion I worried more about than I probably need to have. Not much good comes from trying to make a special occasion any more special than it is inherently. You'd think I'd know that by now. Porter blessed Jamie with good things- that he'll feel love all his life, follow Christ's example of compassion, find truth and beauty wherever he can. And that he'll be a good boy.
The words were wonderful, as I'd hoped and expected. What was just as wonderful but took me by surprise though was the overwhelming sense of love I felt linking generations. Throughout the church meeting after the blessing my mom sat beside me rubbing my arm the way she does when she's feeling emotional and proud. Porter's mom sat beside him with her arm around his shoulder. And Porter and I sat holding Jamie, affectionate as ever. There was no expressions of I Love You's or profound words about parenthood (until now with these such profound words), but I couldn't help but feel like five people on our little five foot wide span of church pew were a little pocket of wonderful, set apart from the rest of the world.
Family for the win.
The words were wonderful, as I'd hoped and expected. What was just as wonderful but took me by surprise though was the overwhelming sense of love I felt linking generations. Throughout the church meeting after the blessing my mom sat beside me rubbing my arm the way she does when she's feeling emotional and proud. Porter's mom sat beside him with her arm around his shoulder. And Porter and I sat holding Jamie, affectionate as ever. There was no expressions of I Love You's or profound words about parenthood (until now with these such profound words), but I couldn't help but feel like five people on our little five foot wide span of church pew were a little pocket of wonderful, set apart from the rest of the world.
Family for the win.
5.14.2015
30. A Grown-up time list
How this list came to be: I'd been planning on writing a 30 Thing I Know at Thirty, much like I did at 25, but in thinking about it over the last several months, only a few Thing I Know really felt as right and real as I wanted them to (and I apparently take lists like this very seriously). Then I was going to do a 30th Year Bucket List. I had made one for Porter and it was a great reminder for us to go and do all the things we wanted to. Then last month I read this article about a woman who approached 50 with an outright plan to conquer her fears. She was quick to point out that it's not a bucket list, and it most definitely can't have anything to do with others' responses to her items [“I’ve done every one of your things,” some bragged, as if the fact they had faced her fears was somehow meaningful.]. So I started thinking about fears. My mom is turning 60 this year and I started brainstorming with her. But fears didn't really feel right at this point in my life, nor did a bucket list. Most of the items I had started jotting down all came with a common theme: "I should totally be better at this by my age." So it's time to grow up.
It's not that I feel particularly juvenile, it's just that there are a handful of things (at least thirty, though I had to really think long and hard about some of them) that I feel genuinely embarrassed about being bad at or not knowing how to do at my age.
Making the list has been an interesting exercise over the last month, shape-shifting as I've moved through things that seemed cool but turns out aren't actually important to me, and I'm sure it would continue to do so if I spent more time curating. The category most notably missing is my professional life, which is, as it should be, not so much on my mind right now.
I didn't brainstorm them by category, but they fall well enough into 8 categories. I've starred the ones that I have already started making progress on, just from having the list. Yay for progress.
30 Ways I'll Grow Up This Year
Interpersonal - I'm terrible at making friends. Friendly as I am and as genuinely interested in people as I am, I have always had a very difficult time making the transition from 'Hey you, I know you,' to 'Let's hang out' to 'We are actually friends and I would keep in touch with you even if we lived far apart and there wasn't Facebook.' It's tough!
*1. Cultivate a friendship from an acquaintance
*2. Cultivate a set of couple friends
3. Cultivate friends in my stage of life (new mom, maybe working mom)
4. Host a dinner party with mixed company (friends that don't know each other, I have a weird complex about it)
Beauty-related - I have limited control over my personal beauty and am overwhelmed by options to contain it. While I really have made strides in the 'have control over what you look like' department, good looking hair or makeup that works I'd say is generally a fluke. Moreover, beauty magazines and most beauty departments make me want to puke. If I, as a reasonably confident person feel as bad about myself as magazines make me feel, they are BAD NEWS.
5. Know how to curl my hair in loose curls (consistently)
*6. Have a skin care regimen for my skin type and skin needs
7. Find a brand of jeans that consistently fits my body
Cooking meals - I don't do "meals." I nibble. Which is fine for me, but let's get real, there are times when slices of deli meat, olives or pickled beets out of the jar, and bites of whatever veggies, fruit, or leftovers are sitting around just isn't appropriate.
8. Have a go-to Fancy Dinner Meal
9. Have a go-to Give Away to Someone Else Meal
10. Have a go-to Quick Meal (quesadillas don't count)
Owning? - Not sure what to call this category, but I hate buying things. Shouldn't I already just own everything and have it organized?
11. Have a well-stocked First Aid/Emergency Kit
*12. Have a well-stocked Medicine Cabinet
*13. Have a well-stocked Game Cupboard
14. Have a basic sewing kit and know how to use it
Food in general - Food is soooo boring. The grocery store and the kitchen are my husband's forte, not mine. He's an enabler in this regard, and I love him for it. All the same, it's probably time to get real.
15. Be confident in buying meat - cut, price, health benefit, use
16. Have a baseline grocery list. Know when we have the items, when we're out, and be good at buying their replacement
17. Cook a great steak
*18. Make frosting that tastes good
General interests - I'm interested in things and don't spend time on them. Or, put differently, I think I'm more interesting than I spend time being.
*21. Learn to play at least one song on the guitar well
22. Have a go-to karaoke song
23. Have a cause or organization that I support with my time and money
24. Have a reservoir of Seattle tourist attractions and itinerary suggestions for visitors
*25. Actually start on and launch one of my side project ideas
26. Pick stocks for investment
Health - Health is not usually a high priority for me. Can't quite call it the curse of being a petite girl, because everyone hates when little people complain about being little. But I have very little discipline when it comes to diet or activity.
26. Have go-to 25 minute workout routine
*27. Not be ruled by my addiction to sugar
Personal - And because not everything is public, 28-30 are personal enough I'm not floating them on the internet, but they are sex and spirituality related. That's two categories, not one.
So it's time to get movin, right?
It's not that I feel particularly juvenile, it's just that there are a handful of things (at least thirty, though I had to really think long and hard about some of them) that I feel genuinely embarrassed about being bad at or not knowing how to do at my age.
Making the list has been an interesting exercise over the last month, shape-shifting as I've moved through things that seemed cool but turns out aren't actually important to me, and I'm sure it would continue to do so if I spent more time curating. The category most notably missing is my professional life, which is, as it should be, not so much on my mind right now.
I didn't brainstorm them by category, but they fall well enough into 8 categories. I've starred the ones that I have already started making progress on, just from having the list. Yay for progress.
30 Ways I'll Grow Up This Year
Interpersonal - I'm terrible at making friends. Friendly as I am and as genuinely interested in people as I am, I have always had a very difficult time making the transition from 'Hey you, I know you,' to 'Let's hang out' to 'We are actually friends and I would keep in touch with you even if we lived far apart and there wasn't Facebook.' It's tough!
*1. Cultivate a friendship from an acquaintance
*2. Cultivate a set of couple friends
3. Cultivate friends in my stage of life (new mom, maybe working mom)
4. Host a dinner party with mixed company (friends that don't know each other, I have a weird complex about it)
Beauty-related - I have limited control over my personal beauty and am overwhelmed by options to contain it. While I really have made strides in the 'have control over what you look like' department, good looking hair or makeup that works I'd say is generally a fluke. Moreover, beauty magazines and most beauty departments make me want to puke. If I, as a reasonably confident person feel as bad about myself as magazines make me feel, they are BAD NEWS.
5. Know how to curl my hair in loose curls (consistently)
*6. Have a skin care regimen for my skin type and skin needs
7. Find a brand of jeans that consistently fits my body
Cooking meals - I don't do "meals." I nibble. Which is fine for me, but let's get real, there are times when slices of deli meat, olives or pickled beets out of the jar, and bites of whatever veggies, fruit, or leftovers are sitting around just isn't appropriate.
8. Have a go-to Fancy Dinner Meal
9. Have a go-to Give Away to Someone Else Meal
10. Have a go-to Quick Meal (quesadillas don't count)
Owning? - Not sure what to call this category, but I hate buying things. Shouldn't I already just own everything and have it organized?
11. Have a well-stocked First Aid/Emergency Kit
*12. Have a well-stocked Medicine Cabinet
*13. Have a well-stocked Game Cupboard
14. Have a basic sewing kit and know how to use it
Food in general - Food is soooo boring. The grocery store and the kitchen are my husband's forte, not mine. He's an enabler in this regard, and I love him for it. All the same, it's probably time to get real.
15. Be confident in buying meat - cut, price, health benefit, use
16. Have a baseline grocery list. Know when we have the items, when we're out, and be good at buying their replacement
17. Cook a great steak
*18. Make frosting that tastes good
General interests - I'm interested in things and don't spend time on them. Or, put differently, I think I'm more interesting than I spend time being.
*21. Learn to play at least one song on the guitar well
22. Have a go-to karaoke song
23. Have a cause or organization that I support with my time and money
24. Have a reservoir of Seattle tourist attractions and itinerary suggestions for visitors
*25. Actually start on and launch one of my side project ideas
26. Pick stocks for investment
Health - Health is not usually a high priority for me. Can't quite call it the curse of being a petite girl, because everyone hates when little people complain about being little. But I have very little discipline when it comes to diet or activity.
26. Have go-to 25 minute workout routine
*27. Not be ruled by my addiction to sugar
Personal - And because not everything is public, 28-30 are personal enough I'm not floating them on the internet, but they are sex and spirituality related. That's two categories, not one.
So it's time to get movin, right?
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